Building Confidence, Identity, and Psychological Resilience Among Hongkongers in the UK

Uncertainty Amid Change Is Also the Threshold of Growth

Since the UK opened the BN(O) visa pathway, tens of thousands of Hongkongers have embarked on a new chapter of life, bringing with them their families, aspirations, and courage. As a counselling psychologist originally from Hong Kong and now practising in the UK, I understand deeply that this journey is filled with hope, yet not without challenges.

Many have confided that, after arriving here, they sometimes question their own worth—feeling “not as good as the British,” or experiencing loneliness and powerlessness due to cultural differences, language barriers, and social bias. Some even wonder, “Do I really belong here?”

Let me reassure you: you are not alone, and these feelings do not mean there is something wrong with you—they are entirely human. In the process of adapting to a new life, each of us may experience confusion, self-doubt, and nameless fears. Yet these inner struggles are also opportunities to grow, to rebuild confidence, and to reshape our sense of identity.

1. Confidence Is Not Innate; It Can Be Built Gradually

Many assume confidence is a natural trait. In fact, confidence is a psychological state that can be cultivated through experience and practice. When we repeatedly encounter new environments, languages, and systems, we naturally feel pressure and unease. These feelings often activate old beliefs within us:

• “I’m not good enough.”

• “If I don’t speak well, people will laugh at me.”

• “I shouldn’t speak up—better to stay low-profile.”

Such beliefs may arise from past experiences or cultural habits, but they are not necessarily true, nor are they always helpful in your current stage of life.

You can learn to engage in a healthier inner dialogue, for example:

• “I may not be perfect, but I deserve respect.”

• “I can learn at my own pace—I’m improving every day.”

• “I have the right to express myself; I do not have to be invisible.”

These new beliefs are not formed overnight. However, each time you act with courage in the face of difficulty, you plant a seed for growing confidence.

2. Identity: Reconstructing Meaning Through Cultural Integration

“Who am I?” has never been a simple question for those who migrate. Living in a new place, we may wish to preserve our original culture while also learning to integrate into the local community. This can create a sense of ambiguity about identity, and at times, self-denial.

Identity is not binary. We can be Hongkongers and members of the UK community. Identity is not defined solely by birthplace, but by how we choose to participate, contribute, and connect.

Consider the following ways to rebuild a sense of identity:

• Take stock of strengths shaped by growing up in Hong Kong—for example, diligence, pragmatism, bilingual ability, and a spirit of mutual support.

• Reflect on how these qualities can be your advantages in the UK.

• Participate in community life (e.g., volunteering, neighbourhood activities, school parent associations) so others can see your value.

Remember: you are not an outsider—you are a builder of cultural bridges.

3. When Facing Unfairness, You Have the Right to Set Boundaries

Living in the UK, you may encounter unkind, biased, or discriminatory behaviour. Such experiences can be hurtful and infuriating, and they may lead you to question whether you should remain silent.

Silence is not your only option. You have the right to speak up and protect yourself—calmly and firmly.

When you face inappropriate treatment, you might consider saying:

• “Please speak to me respectfully.”

• “I do not accept this kind of remark.”

• “I will document this incident and consider reporting it.”

If the situation feels unsafe, prioritise leaving. Then record the time, location, and what was said. You can seek support through the following channels:

• Police: 101 (non-emergency) or 999 (emergency)

• True Vision: https://www.report-it.org.uk

• Citizens Advice: free legal and practical support

• Community support groups: Hongkonger mutual-aid groups, local Chinese community centres, etc.

• Cultivating Psychological Resilience Through Small Steps

Psychological resilience does not mean feeling no fear or pain. It refers to our capacity to gradually rebound in the face of stress or adversity, and to keep moving forward.

You can nurture this inner strength by:

• Recording one thing each day that you can genuinely encourage yourself for;

• Practising a “courage ladder”: starting small (e.g., enrolling in an English class) and progressing (e.g., volunteering in the community);

• Building mutual support networks with other Hongkongers to share resources and experiences;

• Practising simple self-soothing techniques such as deep breathing, mindfulness, and positive self-talk.

Conclusion: You Deserve to Live Here—with Dignity

The UK is not perfect, but you do not need to be perfect to be accepted.

As Hongkongers, you bring diligence, perseverance, cultural assets, and strong family values. You have the capacity to adapt, and the courage to create a new life for yourself and your loved ones.

Please remember these three messages:

You belong here.

You have value.

You are not alone.

May Hongkongers not merely “survive” here, but truly “live.”

May you find strength and companions at life’s turning points.